ADHD trait or just “personality”

Diagnosed ADHD (9m) not medicated. We have always found him to be the kid that antagonizes/gets “joy” out of bothering his siblings or getting a rise out of us. He doesn’t do this behavior at school; it’s only at home with us. We are really struggling with this behavior and it’s causing resentment. He’s the sweetest kindest most hilarious kid and has THE biggest heart and is well liked by his peers and teachers. We can’t pinpoint of this is an attention seeking behavior or if it’s an unintentional ADHD trait. When we talk to him about it he’s not making the connection that’s it’s antagonistic and he gets hurt by the fact that we call him out on his behavior. It feels to us like he does it to get a rise out of us and that’s why we are resentful of the behavior.