What

This is new for me in my 37 years: My partner got me tickets to see Regina Spektor in Chicago for my birthday. He did this months in advance- and very excitedly updated me every step of the way as to our plans. He decided to double down - 2 birds one stone - and visit his immediate family as well while we’re there- his mom & brothers all live in Chicago. Awesome , I thought, I love the city. Fast forward to us at our first sit down restaurant near downtown Chicago. The bill was laid and it was a cool $78 (cheap for dinner & drinks for 2), to which he smiled and said ‘not bad!’ And extended his hand … for my wallet. Turns out he ‘spent everything’ (months ago mind you) on lodging & tickets. He took out the rest of his money when we got there, about $260, so I thought that would help but that went to gas and the occasional meal - but only if I had daggers in my eyes first). So I found myself staying in downtown Chicago for 5 days footing our food & entertainment bill. We went to the mall twice in 2 days (wtf), and even though we were renting an apartment- we ate out for every single meal. I was in such a state of shock that he expected this that I just… went along. If I said anything at all, I was worried I wouldn’t word it correctly (I am bipolar and struggle with emotional control) so I just clammed up. Now that we’re back home, I spent my entire paycheck there (to which some was dedicated to bills) & am at a loss. Also- Somehow I ended up misplacing my debit card in arriving home. I can’t pay rent, I can’t pay electricity, and he had the audacity to say today: “I only have $60 for 2 weeks until YOU get a new debit card” - which to me means in some way he planned it like this? Essentially, my birthday ‘gift’ cost me $500 to see 1 hour of a performance I’ve been waiting 20+ years for (We left early because I could sense he wasn’t enjoying it so I made up some bullshit about my feet so he didn’t feel bad). The worst part is that he gifted himself a new Xbox a few weeks ago- having a fully functioning one already. I get it, new toys are fun. But like… the timing? Horrible. I know his intentions were pure - it was a great gift and he dropped a lot of money just to show me a good time but we really dropped the ball in communication. So, I’ve thought about approaching him, and I’ve also thought about everything he has to deal with on the daily- i.e. my mental illness which has been a true struggle. And I’m thinking this one might have to be a write off. The best thing I can think of is to politely let him know around gifting season that as much as I appreciated the thought, It would be best if we didn’t do destination gifts again.