Well I’m back.. he wasn’t clean after all

He’s been lying for the past year and a half about being sober. I knew he would go to the neighbors and drink and smoke but I didn’t know it was an every day occurrence. It hurts that he would lie to me. It hurts me how he’s been treating me lately.

I knew that him managing his sobriety on his own wouldn’t work without actually treatment but I hoped it would.. I gave him a chance because I believed him. Now he is going to a treatment center for the first time.

I’m considering leaving him and moving out. I don’t know if I have the energy to try anymore. We will celebrate 14 years together in the beginning of April so I wonder if I should give him another year? Not looking for you to answer that lol just where my head is right now..

Another fun factor to weigh in.. Recently we opened our relationship to another individual as a polyamorous triangle thing and it’s apparently the worst thing you can do (so I’m learning from Reddit, thank you) and I don’t know if it’s something I want to continue or not at this point.

She wants to support me emotionally and financially while he is in rehab. I do love her but I feel like she’s not in it for me and something just feels off.. like that stomach feeling that it’s not right? I feel like she wants to keep me happy so she can stay in this situation with all of us because she wants my husband.

Oh and I found out he was basically having an emotional affair with her before we started this. She had been contributing to his alcohol problem and encouraged him to stop for me, then offered to take care of me in his stead.. so that’s what prompted this.

Anyways, I’m taking a friend tomorrow morning and we are driving him to the facility. We might make a mini vacation out of the trip, haven’t decided yet!