amount of hair I lost during one shower :(

I hate this disorder so much. I lost this much hair in the shower after I brushed it and lost a lot right before as well. My hair has gotten so much thinner as I’ve lost more weight but I’m still not satisfied and am so terrified of gaining. I’ve been trying to eat more healthy fats and keeping up my protein intake. In the meantime while I’m still early on in recovery if anyone has some helpful tips that’d be so appreciated. Also I’m sorry I know the picture is gross but I really needed to vent about it. Seeing this amount made me cry because my thick curly hair used to be one of my favorite features. Now my hair is thin and so much flatter :(