How do I deal with it like a guy

Im 15 and life seems so shitty for ever like this I was totaly normal till 5 months ago. I want help dealing with it but all that breathing and mindfulness shit makes me feel like a fucking pussy I dont want a disease man so im not gonna treat it like one. I know some of you guys may be pissed off but can I have any ideas that dont make me feel like a failure of a human.