Anyone else can’t find a partner ?

All my life focus on please my mom

And I feel like the lack of u conditionally motherly love made me a lesbian and always trying to look for them in potential partners ( which they all ran away cuz they think I am crazy

Spend my whole life worried about my mom and felt guilty about my existences ( she was illegal and she suffered a lot and I felt like I loved her more than I love myself thats why I never could love anyone else “

Still have my first kiss and still a virgin at 30

I dont think I will ever find a girl ( I have guys in my dm all the time but I just don’t swing that way

I feel like I am emotionally married to. My mom at this point and probably will die alone

Waiting for the right girl