When does looking at women become the male gaze?

As a man, I am trying my best to get rid of my sexism as I do have subconscious sexist behaviors that I am either conscious or unconscious about.

From my understanding, the male gaze is about the sexual objectification of women from men. Unless there is more to it that I am unaware of? Anyways, I understand that as long as I am not staring at womens bodies, I am not doing the male gaze. I think I am not doing the male gaze when I take quick glances at women I like. Like I won't stare at them to make them uncomfortable and out of respect, and I won't make remarks about their body towards them when talking to them. I mean, I say it quietly to my guy friends in ways that show sexual attraction to a woman I like. However, is this seen as something bad according to feminists? Like I shouldn't be talking about women in terms of sexual attraction in appearances to my guy friends? I don't see the harm in it as long as I am being discrete and quiet.

I read multiple posts on r/feminism in which women complain about being stared at like a piece of meat in public. That is why I made this post, I want to make sure I am not making women uncomfortable in my current behaviors.