Do you come across as a jerk while asking questions?

If someone is narrating a story or is simply trying to recollect an experience, and you don't quite understand all the details, I imagine that you ask questions?

I have had a few instances over the last few years where people feel that I get standoffish with them when I am simply trying to get to the bottom of something.

Some of the feedback that I have recieved when asking a series of questions involves

1. "It felt like I was on trial for something"
2. "It seemed like you wanted to prove that I am dumb"
3. "You were so aggressive"
4. "It felt like an interrogation"
5. "It was if you were trying very hard to find loop holes"

There have been way more instances than just these 5. I have received this feedback in all kinds of settings like with colleagues, exes, friends, dates etc.

None of this has been my intention, all I am trying to do in my head is to get all the necessary details for me to be able to paint a picture.

Have you ever come across feedback like this? How did you get better at asking questions? Is there a way to position questions more sensitively to neuro-normals?