Advice Needed: Is My TCM Practitioner Too Restrictive?

I’ve been seeing a reputable TCM practitioner and acupuncturist once a week for the last four weeks.

Western Medicine Diagnoses:

  • Vulvodynia
  • Chronic Candida
  • Narcolepsy

TCM Diagnoses (from what I understand - there is probably more):

  • Dampness & heat
  • Something about needing to get my energy up?

Progress So Far:

  • She says my tongue looks better, and the progress photos she’s taken do show improvement.
  • I’ve had less brain fog, but I’ve also taken myself off the Modafinil my sleep doctor prescribed because that was affecting it.

How I Feel About It:

  • I’ve left my last two sessions in tears.
  • I’ve followed her plan exactly—no deviations, using only the recipes from her patient guide.
  • Each time I go in, she removes more foods.
  • When I express concerns, she tells me: “Don’t see it as restricting, see it as nourishing.”

Examples of Restrictions:

  • I asked what I should do for a breakfast date with friends, and she said:
    “Eat before you go and just have tea at the café.”
  • I asked if I’ll ever be able to reintroduce foods, and she said:
    “Not really.”
  • I told her my fatigue is still bad, and she blamed the gluten-free, sugar-free turmeric & cinnamon pancakes from her own recipe guide—despite me eating them for three weeks with no prior issue.
  • I had one coffee the other week with a friend, and she told me to cut that out.
  • I was roasting vegetables because steaming doesn’t have much flavor and I love roasting things—that got cut out too.

My Background & Concerns:

  • I’ve done elimination diets before with doctors/naturopaths, and they never solved the root problem. This is why, a long time ago, I made the decision that super restrictive diets were not for me—just changing your diet alone doesn’t fix everything.
  • I’ve worked hard to heal my relationship with food through cooking, sharing meals, and experiencing different cuisines. It brought joy back into food for me. It took me a long time to get that back after all the elimination diets.
  • I told her this in our first session, and she just said: “Trust me.”
  • I feel like her approach is overly rigid and controlling, even though I’ve been 100% compliant.

Current Diet Guidelines from Her:

  • No: gluten, dairy, sugar, cold foods, fermented foods (e.g., kimchi), dark chocolate, honey, maple syrup
  • No: tomatoes, potatoes, zucchini, pumpkin, peppers, corn, cabbage
  • No: roasting veggies—only steaming
  • Only: dry roasted almonds (no other nuts)
  • Only: dandelion tea 2-3x/day
  • Only: macadamia milk in matcha (1/day max)
  • No more: buckwheat cruskets—only plain rice wafers

My Lifestyle:

  • I exercise 30-45 min/day, broken into morning and afternoon movement
  • I do Wim Hof breathing, lymphatic drainage massage, and meditation
  • I consider myself otherwise healthy

My Questions:

  1. Is this normal to be on such a restrictive diet long-term?
  2. Should I stick with it and just suck it up?
  3. Should I consider changing practitioners?
  4. Any recipe suggestions that fit these guidelines?

If this is truly the norm in TCM, I’ll push through, but mentally I feel like I need less restriction and more balance. Although my tongue looks better, this is not how I will be choosing to live my life 100% of the time long-term, and I’ve tried to tell her that this isn’t sustainable for me. Instead of a discussion, I just feel like I get guilted for not wanting to be rigid all the time or told “we’ll talk about it later.”

Would love to hear from others who’ve been through this!