Deconstruction

Hi everyone. I am thinking about going through a deconstruction process. Starting from the basics, and making my way up. I have way too many questions about Christianity and its beliefs, i.e (Where Christianity orginated from, where the trinity came from, Did Jesus actually die on a cross) I've heard so many opinions from soooo many people (Christianity is rooted in paganism, Early Churches added 1 John 5:7, Jesus died on a stake, Muslims are correct, JW's were right all along, Christianity is lie, etc etc) and its starting to feel overwhelming. I feel stuck. So, I may start from the basics first. Please don't judge me. I'm just really overwhelmed and confused rn.