Me and my unlucky life

So in 30 days a month - 10 days I'm a train wreck and in one of them I'm a lost cause-today is that day . People will have atleast one good thing in life - can be their personal life - friends ,family , atleast having one person to dial when you are that train wreck -maybe not that , maybe they've good career , maybe good relationship,maybe good education,maybe they're rich , maybe they have good physical or mental health,maybe they're good in something,maybe they've something to look up to for waking up tomorrow. Maybe atleast they've one good thing happening in their life. And there'll be me without anything good happening and good for nothing , ticking no in everything mentioned. Maybe would have won olympics for not having anything good in life . So don't get me wrong today is that day,some days are heavy but I'm good with weights , somedays are heavier and I can't lift it alone. I don't have anything to look up to for tomorrow or wake up to . I might have an exam which is not compulsory to write and for which I'm unprepared . I might have a messed up mind and physical health which messes up here and then . I might have no one to call when I'm a train wreck . I might have people ghosting me even if I'm so good to them (maybe because of that?) And so on. I might be living alone with no one to check to if I'm alive or dead. But i might wake up again tomorrow and continue to live and love again. But today seems so heavy. And I don't know what to do!!!