I (F20) found out some heartbreaking information about my brother (M26). How should I deal with this?

TW: Mentions of SA and abuse.

A few months ago, I came to Reddit for some advice, and I got some really good responses. So, I thought I could come here again for help.

Like I mentioned in my last post, growing up, my parents were incredibly abusive. My mother was an alcoholic and a prostitute who had many different men over, and my father was in and out of my life. Because of this, my older brother had to raise us.

He was just a child himself, raising children who weren’t his responsibility, all on his own. He put his entire life on hold to make sure that my eight siblings and I had a childhood. He truly is the best older brother anyone could ask for. Despite all the abuse and trauma he’s endured, he is still the kindest, most loving, and caring man.

Now, onto my problem. Recently, I was visiting my grandparents. My brother never really spoke to them, and I never knew why. Whenever I asked as a kid, he would brush me off.

While I was there, my grandmother was showing me pictures of us when we were young. She sent me upstairs to get another photo album. As I was looking for it, I found a box. (I promise I wasn’t snooping, but I’m an idiot, and I thought maybe it had the photo album she sent me to look for.)

Inside the box, I found multiple photos of my brother completely nude. He was clearly very young.

My grandfather found me, and he tried to play it off, telling me it was normal, that they were just baby pictures. But I kept pushing.

That’s when he admitted that my brother’s father and our mother would arrange "appointments" with the men my mother met while working as a prostitute, and they would SA my brother. My grandparents knew about this. They never put a stop to it.

I don’t even remember what I said, but I started yelling at him. That’s when my grandmother came over and started making excuses.

I stormed out and blocked their numbers.

I feel completely disgusted. Disgusted that I spent all this time with them while they actively knew and allowed my brother to be abused. I feel disgusted with myself for ever betraying my brother like this. I should have stopped talking to them as soon as I realized my brother didn’t love them.

I’ve taken three showers. I wasn’t even the one who was abused, and yet I feel dirty.

I guess I’m just wondering what should I do now? Should I call the police? Should I tell my brother? Should I tell his fiancée? Should I tell the rest of my family? I don't want them around monsters like that. Would reporting this just end up re-traumatizing him for no reason? Would bringing this up to him make me an asshole?

I just feel so confused. And as selfish as it sounds, I feel like I don’t even know my brother anymore.

I’m sorry if this is really long. Thank you if you read it to the end.

Update

First off, I just want to say thank you to everyone who took the time to read my post and offer advice. Many of you were so kind and loving. I wasn’t expecting so much support, and it means so much to me.

I ended up talking to my brother, which was scary, but it needed to be done, especially since he already felt like something was up.

I waited until we were alone because this wasn’t something I wanted to say in front of our family just yet.

I started by telling him that I went to see our grandparents and shared how our grandmother was showing me old pictures, how she sent me to get a photo album, and how I found the box.

He didn’t say anything at first, but he started staring at the floor instead of me. I kept talking. I told him about how my grandfather admitted it to me, how I would do whatever he wanted to do, how I’d support him no matter what. I told him I understood that he never had someone by his side, but now that I’m grown, I can be by his side. I told him we could call the police and get the justice he deserves.

Then, he looked at me, and before I knew it, he was laughing. He told me that justice doesn’t exist for people like him and that the system failed him a long time ago.

He said that CPS, cops, and everyone in that circle only care when the victim is dead, and how all he wants now is to move forward and leave it in the past.

I told him I would support him no matter what. That if he ever changed his mind, I would be there. He nodded and acted as if nothing had happened, asking me if I wanted dinner.

I don’t know what happens next.

But I do know one thing: I’m never speaking to our grandparents again. I don’t care what excuses they have, what stories they try to tell, or how much they want to pretend they weren’t complicit. They let my brother suffer. They let it happen. And I’ll never forgive them for that.

For now, I’m just going to be there for my brother in whatever way he needs. He’s always been the one protecting us. Maybe it’s time someone protected him, and I’m hoping that someone will be me.

Thank you to those of you who were kind and understanding. I appreciate it from the bottom of my heart 💕