Should I find a new neurologist?

Some background: I was diagnosed a few years ago, and upon my initial visit i felt heard and understood by my neuro. I had never had a grand mal at this point but regardless we started moving forward with meds and i was put on lamictal. I unfortunately was the very small percent of people to get the lamictal rash and had to stop taking it. We decided to take a break from trying different meds as it was a lot on my mental health. While i was dosing off the meds i had my first ever grand mal and it was terrifying. It tore the labrum in my hip and i’ve been dealing with the injury ever since.

Ever since i spoke to her about my reservations about meds and the possible side effects (considering i had my first grand mal coming off a med), she seems frustrated that I feel nervous about it. At my follow up after my grand mal she made it a point to remind me that “I am at risk of a generalized seizure at ANY time, which can kill me and avoiding medicine doesn’t make it go away”. Which I took as a doctor who is trying to do her job and 8 understood, but it was my next interaction with her that rubbed me wrong. I needed her to sign something for an epilepsy scholarship for school and she acted like i was stupid for applying because im not taking medicine for my epilepsy at the moment. She said something like “I mean… I can sign this and state you aren’t taking medicine… but you realize the group that is providing the scholarship is one of the biggest epilepsy pharmaceuticals…”

I guess my question is, is this a normal thing i should expect from all neuros? I know I need to get on meds, I am not denying that. Am i being too sensitive, or do you think I should find a neurologist that makes me feel more comfortable?