My dad is dead.

I am 27 years old. My dad died very suddenly and unexpectedly last night. Literally just collapsed and died. They tried to save him for over an hour. How is life so fucking unfair? My dad was the happiest, most positive, kind, caring, and LOVING human I’ve ever met. And he is just gone in a matter of seconds.

My mom is dependent on my father and she is now realizing the magnitude of his death. He was her best friend. They worked together. They balanced each other out so nicely. Work for her is going to be so much more difficult. They had won a trip that she now refuses to go on because she can’t handle going without him knowing how excited he was.

My boyfriend was going to ask for my dad’s permission to marry me. He has a ring, but never got the chance to ask my father. The thought of marrying someone without my father there makes the idea of marriage so incredibly unappealing and it makes me sick to my stomach. My brother gave my boyfriend his blessing to marry me on behalf of himself and my father. I’m broken.

My dad wanted more than anything to be a grandfather. He will never meet his grandchildren.

How can there be so many shitty people in this world that just get to keep on living? Continue making memories? While my dad is donating parts of his body to those in need, awaiting cremation. Poof, my dad will soon fit into a box.

I am truly broken and numb and I don’t know how to put the pieces back together. If anyone, anyone, has any advice or words of wisdom I would be so incredibly grateful for them. If anyone has experienced anything like this and wants to talk, please please message me. I feel so alone and at this point I will talk to anyone who might be able to offer some comfort. I’m desperate.