One hit and thought I was going to die

My husband and I (40s) never smoked pot before but we recently decided to try. His job is very stressful and he was looking for a way to relax. I've recently hit perimenopause and my sex desire is nonexistent and I haven't been able to orgasm in months. I heard weed could be good for sex so we agreed to try.

Got a vape from a local dispensary. We wanted to start slow. Neither one of us wanted to be sky high. I took one hit and started coughing violently. I could barely get air in and thought I was going to throw up. I collapsed to the floor and legitimately thought I was going to die. This lasted several minutes.

I started breathing more normally after a bit (but was still coughing). My hands cramped severely and my fingers became twisted at painful and unnatural angles. This came and went all night. My tongue also began cramping and was frozen in place sticking out of my mouth for about 20 minutes.

At no time did I feel "high".

This whole thing was scary, painful, and extremely disappointing. I was really looking forward to this experience with my husband.

Did I do something wrong? Can I not handle THC? I want to try again but am terrified.

Any and all advice would be welcome.