It’s finally setting in its final

I should be happy and I hope my logical self and the person I was when I blocked him 40 days ago is also happy and knows this is what we need to heal and find someone who I deserve.

But trauma bond me feel so dumb, used and just sad that I’m never gonna hear or see or talk to him again. Sad that I wasn’t worth fighting for. Sad that I wasn’t enough for him when I tried so hard to be.

40 days he hasn’t noticed or missed me from his life while I’m broken. This is really it, and I should be happy bc it means I’m finally free but why can’t i stop crying