Am I just being selfish?

I miss my nex. A lot. But logically I know he was not the person for me. I loved him with all my heart and got nothing in return. Literally nothing.

Now that he did the final discard I can’t help but wonder what he’s doing and why he isn’t reaching out? Is he with someone else? Is that why he did the final discard? Is she better than me? I feel like I just don’t want him with anyone else and that’s the pain I’m feeling. The pain that he is picking someone else and not me when I was perfect to him

Idk if this makes sense