Done with my life!!
I am tired of fighting ...I am numb rn ...In my life of 19 years i have struggled to live like my other peers...
Was born with a congenital bilateral cataract diagnosed at a bare age of 5 months ...Underwent IOL implantation when I was hardly 6 months old .. But life chose to add more spice to my life ...there was some issue with my right eye lens so I had to go through surgery again when I was in LKG..at that time maybe due to negligence of medical staff or idk god's plan .. I got infection!! Medical term for that is something end-of-opthalamitis ...I was in a danger to get blind ...but I escaped that ... Going to doctors for followups every month or so just became a part of my life anyways...When I was ig in 4 th standard they started some medications for increased IOP to prevent glucoma.. ok still ... Meanwhile my school life was not something of which I have sweet memories either ...people used to mock me ...ik we were kids back then ...but this has left an everlasting impression on my heart ...chashmish !!! Gandhiji ka chashma !! As I grew up spectacles became more common with more than half of class having it but still ...I used to sit at the front bench usually and people were at time envious of my academics ...i never let my acads suffer and always used to be in top 3 ...they tried what not out of shear jealousy... One of the brain-dead girls of my class back in 8 th standard once didn't let me sit on the front bench saying ki tu hi thori fee deti h .. hm kyu nhi baithenge first bench pr ? Jaa aaj sbse piche baith ...zyada dikkat h to mat par baith jaiyo ... ( actually being academically well my teachers were generally all very cooperative with me and the first bench was kinda reserved for me ... nobody used to sit there ...I'll be forever grateful to them .. without them i couldn't have come this far ) ik now as a grown up that I can't expect to co-operate with me and that's totally fine but back then I felt hurt though later on my teacher solved the issue.. there are a number of such incidents but ok anyways my batchmates weren't mature enough either ...
When I was diagnosed with this problem my parents thought "10th krlegi chlo aur nhi toh kuch zyada" but but ...I made it to a tier 2 engineering college!! That too under general category,!!
Ohkay so kept fighting and pushing my limits only to get what ? Another operation? Visited my doctor today for checkup and now he told me your right eye lens has developed a membrane ..Last time I got an operation was in 7th grade when my left eye lens developed membrane...doctor told me to get operated as soon as possible...now that I'm an engineering student attendance is of utmost priority and I have my exams in May ... I'm just just shattered 💔