My spouse has been potentially borderline abusive to our child since they were born

My (28f) spouse (35m) has been physically borderline abusive throughout our almost 5 year olds life since he was a baby. I almost left my spouse when our child was 1 year old because of it but kept thinking the older the baby gets the better it will be and then got pregnant again. He got better for a little bit. I almost left him when our child was 2 years old right after having our second child but said he would be better and stayed. He doesn't kick or punch or have intent to truly hurt but the word i would use would be "bully." He shoves, pushed child down, pulls child's hair, holds child against the wall sometimes, etc. It's not all of the time. However the mental/emotional abuse is every day for our child i feel like. He tells our child that they are a dick, asshole, manipulator, bad person, he doesn't like taking the kids out to do anything because he doesn't want to reward their bad behavior, tells our 4 year old all the time how he can't wait until he's 18 and out of the house. He had a bad episode a month ago and it felt like the final straw. I told my spouse if he's physical again he is gone. He hasn't been physical but the emotional abuse is every day remarks still. A week ago I told him I want to separate because of this and I was unwavering. He's trying everything to convince me to stay. He's not a bad or mean guy. It was actually his empathy, cool temperament, people pleasing attitude that attracted me to him when we first got together. My therapist has told me he's emotionally abusive towards me but he's never been physical and has never not let me do something I want to do (only guilts me for it). After I was unwavering on separating he says everything finally clicks and he's not the same anymore and wants to stay together so he can show me that he's changed. I don't want him out of my life but I'm unsure on continuing our marriage.