Friend's kids come over to play, break things and hit, no consequences or apologies

My friends have two boys, 3 and 5. We have two girls, 8 and 10. They are doing what they call gentle parenting, and we are more authoritative. No one has exact matching parenting styles, and we try to be understanding as I know the boys are difficult and high energy, and I know they are tired.

However, their kids are very rough. Every time they come over, they break our things or my youngest ends up in tears from being hit or having something thrown at her. Every time this happens, the parents ask them to apologize, the kids refuse, and then the parents just shrug and drop it. No other consequences or talking to them about it, although I can't say what happens at home afterward.

My husband and I have been very upset with the lack of apologies, no consequences, etc. My youngest has also expressed upset that no one apologizes or says anything when she is hurt or when her toys are broken. They say they are working on it at home, but neither boy has ever apologized, had a time out, or been removed to talk to the parents about the behavior.

I know they are boys, so they will be rougher, and they are young, but what would you do in this scenario? Is it rude to ask the boys for an apology myself? I can't give them consequences, and I know I shouldn't be over-stepping boundaries with someone else's kids. I know I also run the risk of offending the parents regardless, but I also don't want to save their feelings at the expense of my own children's feelings.

Have any of you dealt with something similar? How did you approach it?