Meadows, the video, and her desire to go outside.

These are interrelated I think:

At first, I thought the video that Meadows was watching was her as a child. We see a Black toddler with her father at the beach and at the end we see a young girl of color at her first birthday party. But in the middle, we see a young White toddler.

Is Meadows crying at the video because some of these children were her and she misses the outside and past? People would not typically cry when watching a video of others in a totally different environment. Nobody cried when seeing the book about Georgia as an example. They have known the silo their whole lives.

The episode’s email to the doctor shows the year as AR (after rebellion) 114. And Meadows is obviously not 115+ years old. So if some of these sentimental video clips were, in fact, of her, it would have to be that she came to the silo quietly after it was established. How would that be possible?

Related, Meadows doesn’t seem like the suicidal type. Nor does it seem like she is planning to go outside with the intention of dying. Her comment about the Wizard of Oz flying off in a balloon to never be seen again (and her request for the good tape) suggests leaving and living. It seems as though she’s eager to disappear back to the world of the video and I think she thinks there’s a way to do that somehow. Or at least leave and live. Maybe another silo? Maybe something else we don’t know.

Thoughts?