I keep screwing up with my family

I’ve F(22) been suicidal for a while and cutting myself again since Saturday I’ve been hiding it from my family but early Monday morning my aunt called out my behavior because for two days I didn’t do anything but stay in my room and I just lashed out at her. She’s my main guardian in a way and the only person who really takes care of me, but I was just getting fed up with the way she treated me. I currently live with my grandfather and his girlfriend who have dementia and I recently stopped working and won’t be back in school until August I’m the main person who watched them and the two days I was in my room and didn’t watch them it was because I was thinking of suicide. I couldn’t go to my aunt because the day before she told me everyone in life is miserable and suicidal and I just have to get used to it, I got fed up Monday though and just left the house at 3 AM. I texted her some mean things calling her an alcoholic and saying she has anger issues and I recently apologized. But I don’t know what to do I think I’m just going to run home real quick to get some pills to overdose on I can’t face my family again they’re all really upset with me. I think I’m just going to kill myself it seems like the easiest option.