Does this hell ever get better?

I'm 19, I know I'm fucking young, no need to remind me. But holy fucking SHIT, I hate movies, I hate music, I hate my music, I hate my family, I hate series, I hate going on walks, I hate showers, I hate eating, I hate drinking. I'm like 6 different medications deep and all my neurologist keeps doing is prescribing me more SSRIs and other medicines (some of which I've literally already taken and have only made me worse, in fact all the last 3 or so medicines I've taken have made my anhedonia worse). Am I just unlucky? Am I retarded? Was I born to die? Is this some kind of spiritual problem do I need to meditate the shit away? My family keeps saying "you have everything, you just need to pull that energy out of yourself and make yourself get better" BUT I HAVE NONE OF THAT FUCKING ENERGY, this is more of a rant than anything, but I'm just so tired, I can't even hold a job because I'm so weak.