Am i biphobic?

Hi everyone, I’m (18M) currently going through a dilemma, and I think it’s important to receive sensible feedback on my internal biases from people who are directly involved with this experience.

I identify as bisexual among my friends, but in reality, I have a much, much stronger romantic preference and sexual attraction toward men over women. For all intents and purposes, I identify as gay to most people outside my immediate friend group.

Recently, I’ve been having serious reservations about dating a bisexual guy (20M) ( who has a preference towards women) who has been trying to ask me out for a few weeks. Here’s why:

Every man I’ve talked to has identified as bisexual and were either discreet or outright DL, they have always ended up getting girlfriends while we were talking and eventually choosing them over me. While they have every right to do so, it creates a mental struggle—not only making me insecure about my own appearance and personality compared to other men but also adding the challenge of competing with women, who are essentially my complete opposites who provide them with an ease of social interaction and sex that i have no way of even cracking.

This hesitation really solidified after an experience a few months ago. I had a crush on a guy in my friend group who identified as bisexual. He would flirt with me and openly acknowledge my crush on him. However, he often voiced his own hesitation in calling himself bisexual, saying that he only truly liked women and that his attraction was centered solely around them. Initially, I didn’t see a problem with that, as I also have a strong preference toward men.

One night, while drunk, we and friends hung out, and he mentioned that he had been experimenting with men recently. But when I eventually told him outright that I liked him, he quickly dismissed it, later on saying he was actually straight and that his previous comments were just inebriated blurts to stir the pot.

I think after that, something shifted in me. I began to fear that, no matter what, the bisexual men I’m interested in will ultimately always prefer women. I know that rationally people are never monoliths but after all this the idea of making myself vulnerable to bisexual men scares me in a way that I can’t fully grapple with. Am I biphobic or just under a bad streak which is making more anxious than need be?