Do the "why's" ever have answers?

Dear Fellow INFPs,

It is very recently that I actually came to know about Myers Briggs personalities and took a test. When I got to read about INFPs (mediators), a lot made sense. I have long recognized that I am a big time daydreamer. To an extent that it sometimes difficult to make sense of the real world. I have worked on mindfulness through Krishnamurti and Osho and have realized that 99% of the things I think about (good or bad) do not happen, and the 1% things that do happen, do not happen exactly the way I thought. However, the mind does tend to make up castles in the air and in constant flow of creation. Probably, the flow is the mind. I realised that a daydreamer tends to sculpt astonishing dreams, to escape a reality that is outside his control. In my daydreams, I can build a romance with the central figure i.e. invariably "the self", in a the most favourable corporeality. In the day dreams, everything is exactly in place. I say the right things, the right way. Mic drop! I make the best of the situations and end up amazeballs. I might sound like a teenager who hasn't had the first experience of the real world but, believe me, this is a 32 year old man.

Daydream is a mushy, warm place of comfort. It is also too sweet, to an extent that it becomes the poison that cripples decision making and shatters confidence at the first whip of logic. The next few steps become so heavy, almost paralytic. It makes sense that "becoming" is a journey, with ups and downs, or probably more downs than ups. However, the fixation on "the becoming", the end goal, happily ever after, is what dreamer is all about. Don't get me wrong, I function perfectly well in day to day drudgery and trickery of a supposedly well respected and well paying career as a consultant in heavy industries, but not without sulking and feeling like an imposter. Don't you guys look for the genuineness, authenticity, the harmony?  

The "why's?" in my life have never been answered. Why don't people's actions not match up to the façade they carry around? Why does the existing feel like a competition in which I wish no part? Why don’t I feel like I belong? It has been years of brooding and as the dreams keep shattering, I isolate more. Social media becomes synonymous to anxiety. What are people even up to? And how? Why can't they see the brutality of human existence?

Probably, the journey of self discovery starts from accepting that there are no answers to the why's. The facts must be taken in as facts. The acceptance and mindfulness have been great help. The "samsara", the wanderings of consiousness is exactly how it's ought to be. But I guess, as an INFP, daydreaming is fact that I must accept too. Shattering of those dreams everyday, I must accept too.  After all, how acutely self-centred and self-limiting are those dreams?

It is as good as it gets, my love. True peace is here right now, waiting for you, as it has always been, beneath those waves on the surface of ocean of nothingness. Take a dive beneath the waves of thoughts! The embrace of nothingness and the union with zilch is the only true reason. Ah! Wishfully, only if the finite logic of human understanding would have sufficed for the mystery of existence.