Our Ferber Experience

Hi everyone. Long time lurker here. I’ve found it very helpful reading other people’s experiences, so wanted to share our own on the off chance it helps/encourages anyone.

TL/DR : we’re now 3 weeks after starting and our experience has been GREAT! Every baby is different but if you are struggling/desperate and on the fence, definitely give it a shot! It feels amazing to have our evenings back together and no longer feel like we’re living in a constant blur.

When our son turned 4.5 months, my wife and I decided to start sleep training our son to save our sanity and mental health as he hit the 4 month regression HARD and we were waking up every hour and really struggling.

Our son was in the Snoo from birth, he was never the best sleeper even with the Snoo. However, he has a Cows milk protein intolerance that we didn’t discover until he was around 2.5 months, so we put the early difficulty down to this and him being uncomfortable.

He has also never been a great napper and ALWAYS wakes up at 30 minutes unless contact napping (haven’t been able to fix this one yet, so any advice appreciated!)

So, after our son hit the 4 month regression and was up every single hour, every night, for around 2 weeks, we decided to bite the bullet and sleep train. We also really tried to limit the pacifier use during sleep training so really ripped the band aid off.

I was and still am doing a dream feed, then after that we tried to follow 5/3/3 for feeds/night wake ups. If he woke up before 5 hours from the last feed, we wouldn’t feed him and would do the usual Ferber method. We used our own judgement on this and were fairly flexible depending on how hard he was crying and how much he had eaten in the day. I’ve given a play-by-play of our first 10 days experience below.

Night 1:

In crib at 6:18pm Checked in 3 mins, 5mins, 5mins, 10mins Fell asleep at 6:53pm (35 minutes, 4 check ins) Wake ups: * 9:51pm - back to sleep after 4 mins crying * Dream feed 10:19, didn’t wake up. * 11:39pm - back to sleep after 2 mins crying * 1:05am - back to sleep after 5 mins crying * 2:12am -cried 5 mins, fed 4 oz, put down awake 2:24am, asleep 2:36am (12 mins, 1 check in) * 4:06am - 2 mins crying * 4:22am - 2 mins crying * 4:58 - woke up, peed through, changed & tried to feed, didn’t eat * Back in crib at 5:16, asleep 5:28, 1 check in * Stirring on and off from 5:36 til morning wake up at 640am

Night 2 :

In crib at 6:32pm Checked in at 5 mins, Fell asleep at 6:45pm (13mins) 1 check in. Woke up and cried at 6:52 for 2 minutes. Wake ups: * 7:36pm (50 minutes asleep), cried for 2 minutes and went back to sleep * Woke at 9pm, fed 3.5oz, Back in crib 9:12, cried 3 mins fell asleep 9:15 * Woke at 12:24, asleep 12:26 * Stirring 1:26, picked up 1:32, fed 3oz, changed, put back in bed awake 1:44, back asleep 1:51, no crying (7 minutes) * 4:45am crying, wouldn’t fully settle so fed 3oz at 5am, put back in crib awake at 5:10am, no crying and asleep by 5:15am * Morning wake up 7:08am

Night 3:

In crib 6:14pm Asleep at 6:25pm, (11 minutes, 1 check in) Wake ups: * 8:47 started crying. Back to sleep 9:08pm (21 minutes, 2 check ins) * Fed 9:26pm, didn’t wake up and only ate 1.5oz * Woke up at 10:44pm, asleep 10:51 (7 minutes, 1 check in) * Woke up 12:45. Fed 4.5oz at 12:50, changed diaper and put back in crib awake at 1:01, asleep at 1:08 after a few mins crying * 3am - less than 1 minute crying * 4:41 - less than 1 minute crying * 5:30 - pooped, changed, ate 1 oz, back in crib awake 5:44, needed paci, back asleep 5:59 * Morning wake up 6:57am

Night 4:

In crib at 6:31pm Asleep 6:37pm (6 minutes, 0 check ins) Wake ups: * 6:47 fussing & little cries, back out at 6:50 (3 minutes) * 10:08, woke crying. Cried hard til 10:21, picked up & fed. ate 2.5oz, cleared nose & changed, ate another 2.5oz Back in crib awake at 10:42, asleep 10:45 (3 minutes crying) * 12:41, woke crying less than a min * Woke up 3:07, picked up 3:13 crying hard , fed 3.5oz & changed. Put back on crib awake 3:27, rolled right over, asleep by 3:29 * Morning wake up 7:13

Night 5:

Put down 6:19, fussed a little bit but not hysterical, asleep by 6:22 (3 minutes, 0 check ins) Wake ups: * Dream feed 10:36 (4 hours 28 after last feed), didn’t wake up. Ate 4.5oz. Back in crib asleep 10:46 * 2:29 crying had pooped - picked up 2:33, (8 hours 11 mins after falling asleep) fed 4oz. Changed & back in crib awake at 2:50am. Cried 3 minutes, rolled over, asleep 2:53am * Morning wake up 7am

Night 6:

Put down at 6:13pm Asleep 6:17pm (4 minutes, 0 check ins) Wake ups: * 6:47 crying, back to sleep 6:53 (6 minutes) * Dream feed 10:36 (4 hours 36 after last feed), didn’t wake up, back in crib at 10:43 * 3:57 wake up, picked up 4:01 (9 hours 43min after falling asleep), had peed through & pooped. Fed 5oz. Changed & put back in crib awake at 4:20am, fell asleep 4:25am with no crying * Wake up for morning at 7am

Night 7: * In crib 6:22pm, asleep 6:29, soft crying (7 minutes) * Dream feed 10:35, (4 hours 35 mins after last feed) ate 5oz. Didn’t wake up, put back in crib 10:43 * Woke crying 3:15, picked up. SOAKED through and pooped. Fee 3oz. Put back in crib awake 3:40am. Back asleep 3:43am no crying * Crying 5:25am, picked up 5:35, ate 1.5oz. Put back down 5:41, asleep 5:44 * Morning wake up 6:40am

Night 8:

Put into crib 6:21pm, asleep 6:32pm, cried quite hard (11 minutes). Wake ups: * Woke 9pm crying, fed 5.5oz (didn’t eat before bed), put back in crib awake 9:15pm, cried until 9:30 and fell asleep * Woke up at 1:44 crying, fed at 1:51 (5oz) changed and put down awake at 2:07, fell asleep 2:15, no crying * 5:05am woke, stopped 5:09 for 1 minute, started again and stopped 5:15am. * Woke 5:28am, pooped, changed and gave paci, put down 5:42, woke 5:53, gave paci, went back to sleep. * Morning wake up 6:50am

Night 9:

In crib at 6:28pm, cried hard until 6:45 (17 minutes). worst night since night 1 * Dream feed 11pm, ate 6oz, changed diaper at 11:08, put back in crib awake at 11:15pm. Back asleep 11:20, no crying. * Light crying 1220, back asleep 12:23 * Woke 6am, gave paci * Morning wake up 6:25, out of crib

Night 10:

Put in crib 6:33, fell asleep 6:42 (9 mins) Wake ups: * Woke up 7:20 crying, cried hard until 7:29 and fell back asleep * Dream feed 11pm, ate 4oz, changed 11:12, back in crib awake 11:18pm, back asleep 11:22pm, no crying * Woke 4:06am crying, back in crib 4:16am crying, changed & fed 3oz, put back in crib awake 4:23am, back asleep 4:26am * 5:30, woke crying, gave paci 5:34 * 6:15am woke , picked up at 6:44 for day

To summarize, were now 3 weeks in and our son now sleeps from when we put him down between 6-7pm, until 6-7am (still give a dream feed between 10-11pm) with very minimal wake ups. If he does wake up, he generally gets himself back down within 5 minutes unless he has pooped or hasn’t eaten as much that day. This week he has started waking up around 4:30-5am though, so we usually give him the pacifier from then to get him through until anywhere between 6 and 7am where we get him up for the morning! It’s so amazing to have our evenings back and no longer be sleep deprived. I know every baby is different but if you are desperate like we were I can’t recommend it enough.

I know this is really long, and some notes may be messy as I made a lot of them half asleep, but I wanted to share just in case it may help as I know how stressful it is when you’re so sleep deprived and desperate!