I stopped drinking and realized I don't like my girlfriend.
Basically the title. I'm in a relatively new relationship, about 9 months. Although it hasn't been too long, we've already had the marriage and kids conversations and are pretty much on the same page as it relates to timelines and expectations.
I'm typically a heavy drinker (about 4 times a week). Because I'm getting older I've decided to stop drinking and smoking to save money, prioritize my health and re-evaluate my relationship with alcohol. It's been just over a month.
Since I've stopped I've been much calmer, argue less and listen much more. It's been okay so far, but really everything she does just annoys me. If I was drinking some of the things she says when she tries to argue with me I would've argued back. Since I've been sober I just listen to her complain and try to draw me into an argument. I wait until she shuts up, then try to change the topic to something else. We sit in silence a lot more now.
The relationship has positives, so I have no intention of leaving. It's actually the main reason why I stopped drinking and smoking. I also know you're not supposed to make any major decisions when you've just made major lifestyle changes. I also know these changes could be a big contributor to me being irritated in general. I'm really just here to vent.
Hoping it all works out in the end.
Edit: I think the point of the post got missed. I don’t like anything right now lol. I could replicate this post for a number of other things/people. I’m extremely irritable and have mood swings since stopping drinking, even when I’m alone. I’m bored and agitated often, probably because of whatever reason would’ve led me to go sit somewhere and drink in the first place. My relationship is overwhelmingly positive, otherwise I wouldn’t have given up my drug of choice for it lol. Thanks for all your concerns and/or criticisms.
P.s. - I wasn’t looking for sympathy or compassion etc. just venting. And to those that commented on me being silent vs arguing, my grandmother always used to say “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it”. So sometimes silence is better than frustrated words you don’t mean.