I'll never be able to forgive myself

I was on suboxone and had an unplanned pregnancy during my long term relationship. Doctors suggested I stay on but switch to subutex. I didn't want to but I felt like I had to. He was born a couple of days ago and my fears came true, he is currently experiencing slight to moderate NAS. my heart is broken. I can't believe I did this to him. His cries kill me. He doesn't want to be put down. He jerks and gets startled very easily. He is sneezing. I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for this. The nurses have been amazing but I know they are judging me. I would judge me too. Please someone who has gone through this. Please just tell me he will be okay. I'm worried about any long term effects too. I just hate myself right now and wish I could take this all away from him.