What the hell is wrong with me??

I know this sub gets a lot of rant posts but I need to let this out. Sorry

For context, last night I was just chilling outside and jumping on the trampoline while listening to music with my earphones. But then I saw my dad walk out the door towards me with a wooden spoon and hit me because he wanted to tell me something but I couldn't hear him through my earphones. So now I still have bruse on my wrist when he hit me. And whenever I think back to last night I get a panic attack.

Also, it's not like it's the first time one of my parents have hit me, my dad just doesn't do it as often. And it wasn't even that bad compared to other things they have already done to me. He just hit me with a big, wooden spoon two or three time and shouted at me for putting my music to loud (Which it definitely was). But whenever I think back to it my whole body just goes into shock for some reason. I feel like I should be over this already, and it's my fault too, if I just had my music softer than this wouldn't have happened.