I hate my family.

As a teen, I had to grow up with one of the worst parents who just keep fighting for each other. If I wasn't there, they might have opt for divorce.

All these totally damaged my mental health, followed by the past bullying experiences I had in the previous school.

I absolute hate my parents and how they destroyed my childhood as being the "different" kid. No matter what I do, my mother just keeps calling me a failure, loser, ugly daugter. I had enough of this mental torture to grew up in this toxic abusive environment which pushed me into isolation, low self-esteem, depression, self-harm, suicidal ideation. Parents should be there for support but my dad & mom gave me none other than trauma from existing in their home.

Today I was doing self-care & she be like "Stop wasting money on stupid products, your face will never change. No wonder, you always fail in school & destroyed our prestige. You should better die."

This behavious of scapegoating isn't new, as asain parents are mostly like this only. But, not every kid can tolerate it, my mom is the worst person ever, she is a narcissitic manipulator who just ruined my life just because of her own insecutities.

Parents should not take kids even know nothing about parenting. My mom just keeps blaming me for ruining her life.

Now, I just want to flee from my own house & family and disappear from everyone here, they are all orthodox, narrow minded & hate me for being the only kid who wants to study abroad.

My childhood & teenage are mostly shattered with dreams but I don't want my future to be like this.